"Aiyah* (name changed for security purposes) is interested in the Lord. She knows she needs Jesus, but she knows if she chooses to follow Jesus that her family will kill her."
Those words have been echoing incessantly in my heart. I woke up many times during the night, with my heart pierced and aching because of those words: "Her family will kill her." I don't know how to do this. I don't know how to tell my friends about Jesus, knowing there is a high probability many of them would lose all relationships with their family and, potentially, even their life if they chose to follow Jesus.
When I say, "Jesus is worth my family," I mean that Jesus is worth being away from my family for two months, not that Jesus is worth actually having all of my family ties severed. When I say, "Jesus is worth my life," I mean that Jesus is worth me losing my life choices, not that Jesus is worth actually losing my life. This reality of family & separation, life & death has forced me to reevaluate my faith. In the West, we like to take the words of Jesus and make them all figurative. We like to soften the harshness of Jesus' commands and twist them into enabling us to "Christianize" what we're already doing.
In Luke 14:25-33, Jesus tells the large crowds following Him that, unless we hate our family & our own life and carry our cross & follow Him, we can't be His disciples. He reminds us to count the cost of following Him. Jesus tells us, "Those of you who do not give up everything you have cannot be My disciples." In Matthew 10:37-39, Jesus tells us that if we love our family more than Him, we are not worthy of Him. Jesus tells us, "Whoever finds their life will lose it, and whoever loses their life for my sake will find it." What a far cry this is from walking down an aisle and passively accepting Jesus into our hearts while changing nothing about our lives.
What would happen if we believed Jesus actually meant the words He said? How would we live our lives differently if we believed that Jesus seriously meant that many of us would literally die, losing our life for His sake? I long to live like this is true. The call of Jesus is not the call to riches and comfort, but the call to die. Church, we must start living like this is true. The ability to live our lives in a way that is for the glory of God and the good of the nations depends on it.
I cannot look Aiyah* in the eyes and tell her that Jesus is worth losing her family and her life if I haven't also counted the cost of losing my family and my life and determined that Jesus is worth it. If we do not love Jesus more than our family and if we do not take up our cross and follow Jesus, we are not worthy of Him. May that truth penetrate our hearts, minds, and lives. May we truly follow Jesus, living and dying in a manner worthy of our resurrected Lord.